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A Shallow Look at SOLO

Written by Neebs on 12. January 2007 01:46

Oh, Chillside, you and you’re new age scream-psuedometal music. You and you’re non-stop December-January onslaught of new material. I applaud you. I applaud you for releasing quality movies in this time of need, and not being snoots about it either. We need you and you’re releases. Without you the moviemaking scene would be a large easily alienated void filled with, well, nothing, that’s generally what’s in a void.

Alright, so what I just wrote may have been me excersising a few of my liberties as a writer, but, hey, as long as it gets the point across. But back to the topic on hand, which, in case you were blind, deaf, and dumb, is Chillside’s new movie about Solo from such teams as Projeckt_kr and Hacker.PK. I’m sure that many of you have already seen this competent and well-edited frag movie. But this isn’t here to announce to the readers and visitors of about the release of this movie, which by my Eastern Standard Time clock was unveiled to the world a number of days ago. Oh, no, this is here to provide a deep, if not fictional, insight into the inner workings of Solo.

First off, the music choice, now, I am never one to critique others, ever, but this must be that rare exception where I decide that bands such as Mnemic, which by the way, is definitely not a word, Raunchy, and Nobuo Uematsu. We can only hope that last name was in fact a human beings name, preferably of some obscure ethnicity residing in the bowels of the cradle of life. Mnemic, the band which has a mind-blowing two songs in this film are arrogant enough as to define their music for their fans. In case you were wondering, they decided to falsely define their music as, “genre-defying Future Fusion Metal”. However, there music is released now, in the present, nixing the future quotient from their outlandish claim. But as the for the “Fusion Metal”, they are nothing more than an Industrial Metal band from Denmark, and wait for it, France. Really? A French Metal Band? I thought those were the nightmares of the rock gods. Guess that proves me wrong. But all in all, the music choice consisted of mediocre Scandinavian Industrial Metal Bands, a very poor choice, as Scandinavia is neither Industrial, nor metal, at least in mind from the time I visited there at a very young age.

Oh for the love of god, the quality in this movie made me vomit, not once, not twice, but thrice. I vomited, puked, barfed, hurled, whatever you want to call it I did it. Not one, may I add, but three times. Three times my pretty orange-ish carpeting was stained with the regurgitation of corn chips and root beer. I understand why the quality was so bad. It was the little faeries who lived inside his computer that corrupted the file. Believe me Soniq, it’s happened to me before. And I lay no fault upon your shoulders.

I hope this terrible excuse for an article provided you with a cheap laugh. If not, well then I have failed. And you can tell me I have failed by hurling stones at me through the internets.


For all you youngins' out there, I enjoyed this movie, download it. Is the first paragraph's meaning that elusive? Are you all truly the intellectual equivalent of the collective State Mental Ward mind.?
#1daniel Style-Productions 12. January 2007 01:58
Haven't seen the movie yet, but if he used some Raunchy songs than I have to check it out!
#2r Style-Productions 12. January 2007 03:16
If the Gods ever willed me to write an article as beautiful as one that has been graced by Neebs' pen (er, well, binary code resulting in digital text) I will lay down my sword and allow my enemy to smite me...yes, will smite me and I shall allow it.
#3s0nkite* 12. January 2007 06:09
gee i dont understand neebs he liked it or not? he talks strange cant understand mutch lol
#4anjers iceCake 12. January 2007 06:28
#3 agreed tbh :D
#5rich hillbillyjunkies 12. January 2007 07:40
Wow, that's _a lot_ of bullshit for one newspost..
#6H-L 12. January 2007 07:41
he totlly loved it and hopes to see more within2weeks of work like every chillside movie has done so far ^_^ if you get this ull understand ;D
#7Smashy Pure Sense Media 12. January 2007 08:35
yeah, scandinavia idoesn't have anything with metal to do. Especcialy not Norway:P
#8fsk Style-Productions 12. January 2007 08:36
The Mnemic music used in this was from the better days when the singer was Danish, not French <33

#7 and in NO WAY is Gothenburg the capital of awesome metal.

Last changed: 12. January 2007 08:36
#9cristal iceCake 12. January 2007 09:37
article is right on!
all agreed basically.
#10pava Style-Productions 12. January 2007 09:39
chris is right on!<3
#11napalm CND Productions 12. January 2007 09:58
dude you are seriously fucked in your head...
#12Marius Style-Productions 12. January 2007 11:43

Last changed: 12. January 2007 16:20
#13FistOr Easy Productions 12. January 2007 12:28
lovely movie
great job soniq keep it up :D
#14essR 12. January 2007 13:01
u should call neebs "Mr. Exaggeration" :/// :P

movie was okay, great frags, music was good too
#15mmd 12. January 2007 13:10
gr8 movie
<3 music & frags
h8 dirty quality & synch
#16Neebs 12. January 2007 13:36
#3 and #4 that's the point, as with #5
#17delirious VertikalProduction 12. January 2007 14:06
good movie, but the zet movie was better. intro reminded me of clix's movie. the editing in the frags part didn't exactly catch me, though the frags did. :o solo's amazing.
#18Krajjs 12. January 2007 14:43
#3 agree with you, this news post sucks.
#19Realized Chillside 12. January 2007 15:41
Didn't think the quality was that bad? It was watchable, and that's the thing that matters... I don't know about you, but that's all it takes for me :)
#20s0nkite* 12. January 2007 16:39
#18 I didnt sayd that sucks i just dont understand many
#21xyanide Style-Productions 12. January 2007 16:54
The only thing I really liked was the textanimation. The rest was kinda dull.
I didnt really feel any synch between the footage and the music, which ruined it for me.
#22pava Style-Productions 12. January 2007 17:20
sick frags :)
#23Artem 12. January 2007 18:34
Good movie :)

At least Chillside's keeping the moviemaking-scene alive.
#24slize Elegato 12. January 2007 19:00
#11 hahahahah

Quality was ok : ) Movie also, i didnt like this music so much. S
Frags are crazy but sometimes i felt that Solo plays against some low skills let we say "bots-players" : ) I expected some better frags on better enemies by solo : )
#25numlocked 12. January 2007 19:50
slize... all the clips in the movie were against pro's im pretty sure
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